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Forms Of Abuseimages from the stories

Matt

I probably wasn’t the easiest person to get along with. I always had to have things a certain way. My dad was always a kind of black and white kind of guy, and no grey areas. If things didn’t go my way, then I’d have to change things. I mean at work I was great, getting my own way and getting things done, but I guess I didn’t have the energy to put in the same amount of effort at home. I’d always have to get my own way. I mean, I was always great at picking up, but then I got really good at manipulating the girls into thinking it was their fault that we were always arguing

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The first time I hit my girlfriend was when we were yelling at each other. Closer and closer, and we were yelling, and yelling and yelling, face to face, and she just said, ‘come on, hit me then’, and I did. I just slugged her. But most of the time it’s just verbal. How can you say you like someone… or love someone… and say some of the things I’ve said? You can pick the shit out of someone else and never really look at yourself, or criticize what you’ve done.

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And the last girl I hurt physically, got really scared, and she left after I pushed her into a door. I mean, I was on the phone the next day trying to get her back, but she’d changed. I think maybe she’d been with an abusive guy before and she was the one who suggested that I go and talk to someone, and put me in contact with the group. I said I’d go, but I only really said it to try and get her back. She stuck to her guns and I ended up going. It’s probably the best thing I ever did. I’m just a happier guy all round after I’ve talked to some of the people she put me onto, you know? You sort of don’t realize that you’re yelling all the time, because you’re not happy with where you’re at in life. And the group’s really good for that.